Smell the air on the other side. I finally got to change certain things about my life... Slowly, adapting and accepting that change is inevitable. And that I can overcome it all. Just have got to stop panicking over the littlest things and with the shortest attention span that I have, to focus and observe the people who matter to me.
I found you in the hopeless place, yet you constantly sought for the company of the most genuine of them all.. And even though I really didn't, you picked me. Even though I've shown how ugly I am on the inside, you accepted me, brought me in to the state that felt the most safest. I appreciated it and I depended on it so much so I was so afraid that one day, it'll all be gone. No matter what, that comfortable spot I had there, was never going to be mine forever.
Call it anxiety disorder, or whatsoever, when happy ending is actually there, I get so uneasy. Like it just never meant to be. How I ended my very first relationship?? I didn't really, I ran away, I questioned every single feeling he had for me. I didn't believe in love. And I guess I still don't. Right now, I don't want to let go, simply because no one could ever beat him in terms of winning a heart.
Dear Gold, you have a heart of gold, and the sweetest smile and you thought me so much, and through every step of the way, I won't lie that your voice has always come into my head, before I make a decision.
Occasionally, outbreaks, or so called, relapse, there can be more than one voice in my head that will eventually make me wanna shut everything out to make me listen to myself more. Then I realise, I don't have one in the darkest time. I'm really just pathetic, but I don't wish to be empathized, I really just need someone to be right next to me. I only want to seek help the one.
I haven't found the one, I can't really count on anyone to be by beside me. Because, it's a battle I gotta fight with myself. And what more easier way, than to find your so called, "other half".
Dear me, I have become weak.
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I found you in the hopeless place, yet you constantly sought for the company of the most genuine of them all.. And even though I really didn't, you picked me. Even though I've shown how ugly I am on the inside, you accepted me, brought me in to the state that felt the most safest. I appreciated it and I depended on it so much so I was so afraid that one day, it'll all be gone. No matter what, that comfortable spot I had there, was never going to be mine forever.
Call it anxiety disorder, or whatsoever, when happy ending is actually there, I get so uneasy. Like it just never meant to be. How I ended my very first relationship?? I didn't really, I ran away, I questioned every single feeling he had for me. I didn't believe in love. And I guess I still don't. Right now, I don't want to let go, simply because no one could ever beat him in terms of winning a heart.
Dear Gold, you have a heart of gold, and the sweetest smile and you thought me so much, and through every step of the way, I won't lie that your voice has always come into my head, before I make a decision.
Occasionally, outbreaks, or so called, relapse, there can be more than one voice in my head that will eventually make me wanna shut everything out to make me listen to myself more. Then I realise, I don't have one in the darkest time. I'm really just pathetic, but I don't wish to be empathized, I really just need someone to be right next to me. I only want to seek help the one.
I haven't found the one, I can't really count on anyone to be by beside me. Because, it's a battle I gotta fight with myself. And what more easier way, than to find your so called, "other half".
Dear me, I have become weak.
